In previous blogs, I shared the many challenges I faced with my dogs when we lived in Manhattan. I wanted to take some time to address where we are now. The relationship between Charlotte and Tricky was under a lot of stress because of the high levels of anxiety Charlotte was experiencing in the city. Her herding (controlling) tendencies had increased to the point that Tricky felt unsafe around her. It was causing tension between the two girls–even a couple of fights–in the home. I see myself as an effective problem-solver for people and their dogs, yet I could not fix a problem in my own home with my own dogs–I was very disheartened and frustrated.
On top of that, I was experiencing regret about moving into the city in the first place. I felt that I had taken a happy country dog, brought her into the city, and made her very unhappy. As you can see, I was being really tough on myself. This was preventing me from thinking clearly and developing a behavior modification program to address the issues. It took me a little while to realize that just because I couldn’t quickly fix a behavior problem didn’t mean I was a failure. The situation in my home was a real learning lesson for me as a professional dog trainer. One important lesson was that sometimes it’s difficult to see the picture when you’re very close to it. Sometimes you have to take a few steps back to see the whole thing. I reached out to well-respected colleagues because the problem was too close to home. Through many conversations, I was able to create a plan.
Several things happened once I was able to see the situation with my dogs without the emotional attachment. I could understand the problem and work to resolve it. The first thing that happened was that Alex and I moved out of Manhattan and into the suburbs. We also bought a car. I then restructured my work schedule so that I could bring my dogs with me three days per week and no longer work weekends. I hired the most amazing dog walker for the days I worked in the city. The weather improved so I started running with the dogs on trails 2-3 days per week. I scheduled agility training for Tricky and Marvel 4-5 times per week. All of this, plus the gift of living in the quiet of the suburbs is what shifted things for the dogs. These changes confirmed for Alex and me that we are ALSO all about the ‘burbs!
I’m thrilled to share that at the end of April, while I was away for an agility workshop, Tricky and Charlotte played for the first time in a year. I was sitting in the hotel room working at my computer after a very fulfilling day of agility training for Tricky when I heard some activity behind me on the bed. I turned around to find Charlotte play bowing and Tricky returning the stance. It was truly a victory! In general, Charlotte has relaxed so much living in a house with a yard versus an apartment in the city that nearly all of her herding-like behaviors have disappeared. She hardly notices now when Tricky and Marvel play–and let me just say, these two terriers know how to rumble! We still follow some basic management to support their relationship, such as dog gates and crates.
So does this mean that all dogs living in the city are miserable? Absolutely not. In fact, if Tricky could blow kisses to all of the people she passed when walking on city sidewalks, she would have. I’ve seen many dogs that appear stressed by city living and I’ve seen many dogs comfortably living in the city. It all depends on the individual dog. Charlotte struggled with the noises and level of activity in the city. She needed more space and less people or dogs around to manage. In the end, it was the right decision for us as a family and we’re excited for what else the future holds.
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